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Writer's pictureEditor Darren Birks

Hypochondriacs: We Have Spent a Year in Prison for YOUR Mental Health, Now it's Time For Our Own


We've vaccinated 15 million people according to Boris Johnson, far more than the over 80s who were the only ones really at risk from Covid, so why did we not scrap ALL lockdown measures on that milestone date? Why are The Worried Well now in charge of the country?


The media is still full of Covid bedwetters who don't want the lockdowns to end. So terrified of some imagined plague that they want to hide behind the sofa, complete with hazmat suit wearing four masks, for the rest of their lives and expect all of us to do the same. You see our lives, and mental state, don't matter to the Hypochondriac, for them the smallest chance that they may catch a disease is justification for us all to live by their paranoia. We're not seen as human beings by the Hypochondriac, merely biohazards that have no right to be going about our own lives when they're still convinced that the plague lurks outside their front door.


Before Covid of course nobody ever died. We all lived in an entirely safe and illness-free world where Hypochondriacs frolicked in the fields along with the rest of us. Except we haven't, of course, we've always lived with a certain amount of risk. But now, it appears no level of risk, no amount of disease is acceptable, either for the SAGE fanatics chasing zero Covid, or the hypochondriac convinced that everything, and everyone, is a threat to their health.


The NHS even have a term for these people, they're called the 'worried well', and where once they were blamed for clogging up the system they're now actively encouraged by the NHS. These have gone from being a nuisance to being 'model patients' actively encouraged to 'act like they have Covid' and vilify anyone who they see NOT acting like an hysterical moron.


In a Venn diagram with Hypochondriacs on one side and Karen's on the other, you know bloody well there's a big melon-shaped intersection where most of them reside. They're the same type, and now the government's biggest supporters. For them, no lockdown is too tough, no law too draconian, no penalty too severe. Lost your job? Tough. Your kid's future destroyed? So what? Your partner committed suicide from repeated lockdowns? They don't care. This is a pandemic where we are "All in it together" - the 'it' being utter hysteria.


We have been in this state of paralysis for a full year now. Millions of healthy, sane individuals have sacrificed their entire lives pandering to hysterical people. And are those hypochondriacs and OCD'ers going to fix the economy, and get our jobs back? Are they fuck. No, the same people who have had to sacrifice literally everything so as not to strain the NHS or upset hypochondriac-Karen will be the very same people who will have to rebuild the economy, rebuild society, and foot the bill for the pleasure too.


There is no excuse for any restrictions to remain at all. They should be scrapped immediately. The government should create public information films showing people hugging, kissing and generally going about their daily lives in a reversal of the terror campaign they have done to play on the hypochondriac's fears. Show them that, if they go to the supermarket without a mask on that they probably won't die. Let's have another slogan campaign that instructs people to Go Out / Meet friends / Shut the fuck up. with emphasis on that last one. ESPECIALLY that last one.

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